...back to square one...

...lies are always there when u do not need them. i wonder what would it be like to be with someone without any lies? i admit it that i do, too, uses lies to protect myself and ended up trapping myself. my new partner...he is the one who does not like planning. he is the one who likes to do one go...but ended up...not one thing has gone according to plan but ends up in the trash.

i  was frustrated that the trip has been cancelled and the car that he ordered until now no news. i think i, myself, has to do something to earn a car for myself. i was very stupid to do thing according to what he must say. i should do things what i'm better doing at. i feel very stupid waiting for a man to give me money and actually believe in him. GOD, i was stupid. life is never that pleasant. now i know how i should do things.

i should collect all the job offer that i can get and head on to my life. i need money. that should motivate me...No men can stop me from pursuing my destiny...